My Daddy Died Today.

I. can't. stop. crying.

WHY? I mean, I understand all the theological reasons and all that, but right now, they are unsatisfactory answers. WHY my dad? WHY this age?  WHY when he got regular checkups and the doctor told him he was okay? WHY so soon after my grandmother? WHY WHY WHY?

It feels like God is just picking on the Doherty family. What else can be thrown our way? And I know it's not Him per se, but the effects of sin, but I want to hold someone responsible. I guess I should be pointing fingers at the Devil, but I know God has more power, so why didn't he step in and do something because my father was only 52. He was too young. I'm too young. He'll never walk me down the aisle. He'll never meet his grandchildren.

For as wack as my family is, we at least retained the traditional nuclear family structure. My Daddy was the head, followed by my mom, me, and on down the line. Now I understand why God says be kind to widows. Granted we are all grown, but we are still children. We've barely even scratched the beginning of our lives, and now, we have to take care of our mother. I'm not complaining, I'm just stating that being in this situation gives me a new appreciation for those verses. 

Remember how I said 27/2012 was looking to better than 26/2011? Yeah, right. This year can suck it. 

Feel free to give me a spiritual pep talk. I'm not going to get it anywhere else.